"Why doesn't your library have an art section?"

"Well, sir, the previous librarian was rejected from art school. When he took the position, the very first thing he did was to remove all the art books and conceal them. We're positive they're still in the library, so we can hardly replace them, but we haven't yet tracked them down."

"And why doesn't your library have a chemistry section?"

"Well, sir, the very first benefactor of the library was a self-styled alchemist. It seems he deeply resented the reduction of his pursuit to a historical footnote in chemical texts, so as a condition of his bequest, he forbade the inclusion of any books related to the field."

"And why doesn't your library have a children's section?"

"Sir! How can you say such a thing? Our children read all the books; how else are they to learn what they need to grow?"